Being in the moment is something that will help you in all aspects of your life, but it can be particularly helpful for dating.  When you are in the moment you convey a lot of attractive qualities to the opposite sex.

First of all, you’re in the moment, enjoying everything around you for what it is, as apposed to up in your own head.  When you are talking to a girl and you are in your head, she will subconsciously pickup on this.  If when you’re talking, you’re up in your head thinking “Umm what should I say next, ummm would she like it if i did this?” it comes through in the communication.

This is one of the things guys do most that women simply hate.  It conveys low value.  It shows that you are actively placing her as higher value than yourself, because you are putting so much thought into the interaction with the woman.

To avoid being up in our own heads, we must be in the moment.  Now what does that mean exactly?

Being in the moment, essentially means just being.

There are no thoughts, no judgments, no questioning of what is occurring around you.  You are embracing exactly what is going on in front of you, without thinking about what has happened in the past, what will happen in the future, if this is good, if it is bad, if you should do this or that.  You just are.

When you are in the moment people like you.  You come off as genuine and real.  You come off as someone who has a calm and controlled life.  You appear confident.

Most people do not live in the moment and this is the worst thing you can do for your mental health.  If you never stop to just appreciate what is going on right this moment, and spend your whole life wrapped up in the past, or possible future, you will never live life powerfully, be it with women or in any other aspect.

Also, when you are in the moment, you will be enjoying your reactions much  more.  You will be connecting with people much quicker and more deeply because you are being genuine in your experience.  Women will see this quality in you and find it endearing and intriguing.

So how can we begin to live in the moment?

There is a simple breathing exercise that I highly recommend.  It will teach you to live in the moment much more often and to appreciate the moment for what it is.

Whenever you get a chance, or recognize that you’re very out of the moment, just take a deep full breath.  Breath in deeply, filling up your diaphragm first, and then the top of your chest.  As you fill your lungs with air, think no thoughts, but just focus on the air coming in.

Quickly you will be bombarded with no smells sights and sounds of your atmosphere that you didn’t previously notice were there.  You will be appreciating the moment.
Doing this multiple times a day will greatly increase your ability to live powerfully in the moment.

Kurt Spelling

Hey again fellas,

Reflecting back on the last few years, I realize I have changed a lot. I am not the person I once was, and simply knowing that makes me more attractive to women.

Let me explain.

Many men will never stop to reflect on who they are and what they stand for in this world.

What are your morales?

What are your dreams and aspirations?

What are your likes dislikes and standards in personal relations, as well as every other activity you embrace?

Knowing who you are, and more importantly making no excuses for it, is what defines the attractive man.

I know men who I think are assholes, but they get girls. They act the way they do and embrace their reality, their behavior, and who they are as people.

Women don’t want a phony. They want a man with a strong reality and a strong belief in himself.

The attractive man knows what he’s about and follows through on it. The attractive man would never tell a lie to impress a girl, or tailor his actions to the likes of another.

The attractive man knows and loves himself.

Maybe now your thinking “Hey, I DO act like myself, and I never get girls! I can’t be me or I’m doomed to stay a virgin”.

This isn’t true. There are just very minor details of you that maybe need some tweaking. Maybe some negative social conditioning got into certain aspects of your behavior, causing you to not act like an attractive man.

This can all be fixed with a bit of knowledge and a desire to learn, and the attractive man will come out of you faster then you’d believe.

Till Next Time Fellas

Kurt Spelling

Hey again guys,

This could have easily been the first post on this blog, but it just never popped into my head until now.

When you make the decision to get good with women and conquer the dating game, there is a very important first step that you must take. Without this first step, all other steps are pointless, and you will take much much longer to learn how to meet and seduce women.

So what is this important first step?

To conquer the dating game you must define what that means to you. More specifically, what you want to get out of it.

Do you want sex with a different girl every night?

Do you want to meet a special woman who will love and take care of you?

Do you simply want to improve your confidence and charm?

All of these are great reasons to handle this aspect of your life, but which is right for you? Defining what is important to achieve for yourself is the most helpful thing you can do when beginning to this journey. After all, you can’t get where you want to be if you don’t know where that is.

You may not know what you want yet. Some people begin learning how to meet and attract women and their entire goal changes. It’s fine if your goals change, but you must have some to begin with to get the process started.

Open up word pad and write down 5 goals you’d like to achieve in your life as far as meeting women and personal development. Save this file and begin learning and applying everything you can. Check back with it often and edit/update it as necessary.

This will definitely help you speed towards a life full of female abundance and being a man who fully know how to meet, attract, and seduce the women you desire.

Get em’

Kurt Spelling

Welcome back guys,

The attractive man is something that every man is trying to be. Nobody want’s to be Pee Wee Herman, but everyone wants to be Brad Pitt.

Being magnetically attractive to women feels great. Having beautiful women give you love and attention is an exhilarating and delightful feeling.

Did you know that you can become the attractive man just by doing one thing, and it doesn’t involve working out, spending money, or climbing in social status?

To be the attractive man, feel that amazing feeling inside that you would feel if you had everything you wanted in your life in regards to women.

Feel it all the time.

This positive energy will literally flow from every one of your pours and magnetically attract women.

You can achieve this feeling at any time you choose, and with practice, it will become automatic.

There are numerous ways to achieve the incredible feeling of the attractive man, so I’ll just share one. It involves a simple visualization technique.

Sit relaxed in your chair and take a few deep breaths. Close your eyes and visualize exactly how you would like your life to be with women.

See the vision of yourself as the attractive man surrounded by the number and type of women you would love to have. Envision the way these women respond to your every action, and are enthralled by your presence and charm.

More importantly, feel the great feeling that should be bubbling up inside you right now. Feel as if you have already become that attractive man.

Visualize and feel the power of the attractive man and very soon you’ll find yourself to be him.

Till Next Time

Kurt Spelling

Hey again guys,

Todays post is a fun one. I’m going to present to you a few quick and easy ways to be less self conscious, especially at bars and clubs.

Why is this important?

When you are being self conscious, you are not in the moment. You are actually about as out of the moment as possible. As you have read and started to realize through this blog, being in the moment is half of what will make you fantastic with women. This is why you Must be less self conscious.

But what methods will teach you how to be less self conscious?

This is where the fun comes in. You’re going to be less self conscious by doing things that would normally make you INCREDIBLY self conscious. Then when you realize that no negative repercussions come from such acts, you will break down your self conscious tendencies little by little.

Repeating these processes, along with other techniques you will learn from me, will yield incredible results.

I Like Results...

So you’re in a bar or club and feeling a bit self conscious. This takes you out of the moment, making you less fun and social, and killing your inner party.

There first thing to do is Get loud.

I mean REALLY loud. Take your friends and start doing things that invade other peoples vocal space. They should hear you and your friends having fun. Make them look at you and break out of your shell of insecurity. It might make you more insecure at first, but who cares, blast past that!

Tell a funny story with your friends and get REALLY into it. Use big hand motions, and be LOUD with the funny parts. Feel free to actively act out goofy parts of the story, with loud accompanying sound effects.

For example if you’re telling involving an animal, fully act out that animals actions, sound effects and all.

This burst of energy will not only make you realize it DOESN’T MATTER what ANYONE thinks, but will also boost your inner energy and good time.

Another fun thing to do is lay on the floor.

Go ahead and lay on the floor. Sprawl out on your back with your legs and arms out. People will ALL look at you.

It’s OK. I promise it’s OK.

It WILL feel crazy to you, and you WILL be self conscious the first time you do this, but grin and bear it. Forcing yourself to step out of your comfort level is the only way to be less self conscious.

Lay on the floor with everyone staring for a solid 10 seconds. Then just get up and rejoin your friends like nothing happened. A nervous laugh might come out of you, but is completely unnecessary.

It’s funny because it leaves everyone thinking “What the heck?”.

Get used to people looking at you. When you are great with women sometimes you will do an entire interaction with a girl, with a whole audience. I’ve had it happen before. Three normal guys will be listening to your every word and laughing at all your jokes while you are seducing the girl.

The only way to accomplish this is to be less self conscious!

Use these techniques along with others I have given you to begin the process today.

Have fun!

Kurt Spelling

Hey all!

There are so many ideas running through my head, so much information I want to get out to you all, I wish I had enough time to post multiple times a day. Hopefully, I’ll be able to keep up with my crazy life and be here to share my thoughts with you all as often as possible.

Let’s get right into todays topic, the three main behaviors of an attractive man.

**Being an attractive man has NOTHING to do with looks, and EVERYTHING to do with how you behave and emotionally stimulate women. Women are not visual creatures like men, but emotional. The attractive man is attractive because of the way he makes them FEEL.

Women are biologically programmed to respond well to certain behaviors in men. There are literally dozens of behaviors that will make you appear as an attractive man in the eyes of women. However, there are three in particular that stand out as the most important.

1. The attractive man is the leader of men!
If you want to trigger the biological switch in a girl which is programmed to align with an alpha male, you will need to be the leader of men.

When you are in your group of friends, the attractive man leads the conversation and social interactions. He is decisive. He doesn’t wonder about what he will do next, or where she wants to sit in the restaurant, or what they should do that night, he already knows.
Obviously, do not go overboard with this. Your friends and peers make you look more attractive by also being attractive themselves. Don’t be too eager to lead the conversation ALL THE TIME. This WILL get annoying to people. Also, don’t ALWAYS have to lead. Allow friends to make decisions sometimes.

Realize that the attractive man would not engage in a conversation such as “Where do you want to go to eat? Oh, I don’t know what I want, what do you want? Oh, I’m not sure…hmmm” Women hate that, and it is not attractive.

*Hot Chick Intermission

mmmmmm..

2. The attractive man is the protector of his loved ones!

As an attractive man, you are calm, cool and collected at all times. But, if someone should threaten the safety or well being of someone you love, here comes the fierce punishment of an alpha male!!!

An attractive man would never sit by and watch a single person he cares about be mistreated or hurt in any way. Demonstrating this to a girl will make her instantly more attracted to you.

This doesn’t mean go out and start a fight. You can demonstrate this through a story or something that happened in your past. Do not make this story sound like you are bragging “Oh man I kicked the crap out of this guy!” will score you no points.
However, if you happen to talk about how someone made a comment to your sister, and you set him straight because nobody messes with your family or friends, that will get the point across. The attractive man doesn’t mess around!

3. The attractive man is preselected by other women!
If you are truly the attractive man, you are easily in the top 5% of society. This means that women will be intrigued by you and wanting to align with you. Many, many women. Demonstrating to a woman that you are preselected by other women will instantly make her more attracted to you.

Having a lot of girls who you are friends with is very helpful for this. Going out with a mixed group of girls and guys, or even just with girls, really helps achieve this.

If you don’t happen to have a few girlfriends out with you that night, you can demonstrate this quality through story. Talk about your something interesting you did with your “friend” who happens to be Nicole or Amy or something. Women will pick up on this subtlety and realize that you are a man who is used to having women in his life.

Women are very intuitive, and will pick up on all the social cues of all these behaviors. They are so hard-wired to be perceptive to the behaviors of the attractive man, that they will find themselves uncontrollably attracted to you.
Have fun with the behaviors of the attractive man, and realize that these are things you will want to incorporate into your life if you haven’t already. Fake it till you make it! Eventually, the behaviors of the attractive man will become integrated into your core and a part of you.
Thats when the real fun begins!

Till next time You Attractive Man

Kurt Spelling

There are many techniques I have learned over the years for instantly improving male body language. These techniques alone will have more women noticing and becoming attracted to you.

For the longest time, I had simply learned and applied these techniques, and seen the results of them. Now, I have really found their true origin.

Yesterday, I paid a visit to the Bronx Zoo in New York City. The last exhibit we went to see was the “Congo jungle”. This exhibit had numerous habitats filled with gorillas and kept my attention for the better part of an hour. This is where I saw PROOF of dominant alpha male body language, and its origins.

After about 15 minutes watching gorillas come up to the glass and fool around, the big man decided to step out of the area which was out of view of the public. He came hulking out, massive in size compared to all the rest.

He moved slowly, noticeably slower and with more intent then the rest of the gorillas. He then took a seat up against a rock, leaning back with one arm hanging down in between his legs and the other arm chilling at his side.

the man..

“Look mom, he looks bored!” said a small child next to me.

This is alpha male body language at its finest, at its true origins! He wasn’t bored, but he was so comfortable in his own skin, so relaxed in his surroundings, that he had that appearance to the child.

I’ve always known, when you are sitting you should have one hand near your crotch, the other can do what it wants, and be fully relaxed and leaning back in your seat. This was taught to me as alpha male body language. Now I was seeing it, raw and pure.

As I said before, the alpha gorilla moved SLOW. He was noticeably moving at half the pace as the rest of the gorillas. Obviously, this isn’t because he is slow or tired. He is the most physically dominant of them all. Alpha males are completely confident and comfortable in their own skin and would feel no need to rush where they are going.

This applies to all movements. To have alpha male body language, slow down EVERYTHING, even blinking, or reaching out to grab your glass for a drink. Slow down every movement, but at the same time make them more direct.

When an alpha male walks, they know where they are going and they go straight to it. Make each step more powerful, almost as if you were being very particular about placing your foot down in the exact spot it is landing. Same with arm movements, though slower, they are direct and exact.

Another alpha male body language characteristic that was very apparent on this hulking beast was his chest. It stuck out so far compared to the other gorillas, as if to say “I’m here!” Sticking out your chest and having your shoulders rolled back will instantly display confidence to the other sex.

If you believe in evolution, and I hope you do, it makes complete sense that what attracted females for this gorilla will do so for us gorillas. So, stick your chest out and roll your shoulders back. If it feels a bit uncomfortable, you can relax into the position by taking a few deep breaths.

Watching this gorilla move and demonstrate true alpha male body language was simply incredible. With just the few techniques for improving your body language given in this article, you can begin practicing.

Consciously work on improving these aspects, and you will have powerful male body language that will come off as dominant and attractive to all females.

Stay Pimpin’

Kurt Spelling

Life can be unpredictable at times. It is this unpredictability that makes life worth living, and a unique blessing every day.

Sometimes good things happen unexpectedly and it makes you feel incredible. Sometimes bad things happen unexpectedly and it makes you feel like garbage. The problem is, too many people invest their time and energy into the things that make them feel like garbage and not enough of themselves into the things that make them feel great.

An easy way to avoid getting emotionally sucked into the negatives is to realize that nothing is a big deal. This will help you reduce your overall stress in life, as well as overcome your anxiety with approaching women.

Next time something bad happens, just take a step back and say to yourself “How much, on a scale of one to ten, does this event Truly affect my life?”.

You will find much more often then not, that an event which would have really made you angry, scores lower than a 3. It makes it very easy to not worry about any of the negatives. When you realize that most things, in the long run, are truly unimportant and NOT a big deal, it becomes easy to brush these negatives off.

The more you practice this shift of mental focus, the more powerful of a person you will become. As you begin only putting your time and energy into positive things, while brushing off the negatives, you will find that only positive things are occurring in your life.

So how can this be used to ease any anxiety with approaching beautiful women, like this one?’

yikes!

For you guys who are just starting to approach and talk to women, and who may be getting shot down from time to time (haven’t read the book yet?), use this technique to realize the complete insignificance of a woman turning you down.

It will rate as less than a 0.5 on the life changing scale. And after you have gotten shot down a few times you will realize it rates as a 0.

When I first started approaching women, I did this on purpose. I would go up to them with an approach that I KNEW would get me rejected. Doing this for just an hour was enough to make me realize that it truly rated as a 0.

Now, take a look at the opposite ranking. How much, in a positive scale of 0 to 10, would it change your life if that women you approached was that special girl you were looking for, or just another amazing girl to share your life with? What if she was intelligent, hilarious, beautiful, amazing in bed, inspirational, and a kind soul? Well that could easily rank as a 9 or 10!

My point?

Go for that girl you want to meet! It won’t change your life if she turns you down, but if she turns out to be an amazing chick it will add a ton of joy to your life.

You have nothing to lose and everything to gain.

Get em’

Kurt Spelling

Hey guys,

Now that I have your attention…on with today’s post! =P

Eye contact is one of the most powerful tools any man can use when attracting and seducing a woman. Strong eye contact is rare. If you make eye contact, you’d be surprised how quickly most people’s eyes will dart away.

There are a few key aspects about eye contact between a man and a woman that will either have them instantly attracted to you, or instantly repelled. This is, in many cases, the first quality that will demonstrate either high or low value to a woman.

Strong eye contact will turn a girl on. It shows that you are comfortable with yourself and others. A true alpha male will never break eye contact first, whether it be with a man or a woman.

When you make eyes with a woman, never break eye contact first. Even if it has been 10 seconds (which is an Eternity when staring into the eyes of a stranger) do NOT BREAK. If anything, at that point you could stick your tongue out or something silly to break the sexual tension.

This might be very hard for you at first, but there is a simple task you can do which will give you strong eye contact skills. Walk around and make eye contact with everyone. Never break first. If its a guy chances are he’ll just look away, or if he holds it for a while usually a “whats up man” will follow as you pass. If a guy gets serious with you saying something dumb like “what are you lookin at buddy” just say “thought you were an old friend” or something along those lines.

Doing this with girls is fun. Whatever reaction she gives you, you can feel free to give back. If you get a smile, give a smile. If you get a hi, give a hi. Confident girls will hold eye contact and almost always smile. Unconfident girls will look away. Work on this every day and you will have strong flirting eye contact skills, possibly the most important tool for picking up girls.

Enjoy!

Kurt Spelling

Hey Guys,

Something I was thinking about last night while I was out at the bars just popped into my head. Last night, I picked up this girl, even though the club was REALLY loud. I knew she was only hearing half of what I was saying, but I knew it didn’t matter.

Why not?

Because I speak with a deep, resonant, voice.

There are a lot of different aspects that will make you a man who is magnetically attractive to females. One is your voice.

It should be deep, and resonant. When you speak, women should not just be able to hear you, but FEEL you. Your voice should tickle them.

Also, you should speak slowly and rhythmically. This will make women hang on your every word. The slow speech shows that you are a comfortable and confident man. You do not need to rush what you are saying in fear that if you take too long, people might lose interest. You know they will stay hanging on your every word.

There is a few things you can do to practice and ensure that you have these aspects of your voice handled.

First, I want you to take a deep breath, but not the way you normally breath. Breath out every inch of air that is in your lungs, and then breath in until you can’t fit another bit of air in your lungs.

Make sure to breath in so that the bottom of your stomach, near your diaphragm, fills up first and then your chest rises as the rest of your lungs fill.

This is the proper way to breath. Doing this three or four times in a row will make you feel powerful.

It is a technique derived from the Kahunas, the natives of Hawaii. If you’ve never seen them, as a race they tend to have GIANT alpha males, who are solid to the core. This breathing exercise is definitely part of the reason they tend to be this way.

Now that your breathing is corrected, lets warm up your voice.

Take anther deep breath and say the word “wow” but accentuate the “owwwww” for as long as you can, and as deep as you can.

This will help you warm up your vocal chords and allow you to drop into your deep, natural resonant, voice.

Breath in this manner when you are out talking to women, and remember to speak from your belly, not your throat.

This will have women FEELING your voice and getting dangerously turned on.

Enjoy!

Kurt Spelling